Comedy-humor Quote by Pete Sortwell

“Don't save your best for when you think the material calls for it. Always bring your full potential to every take, and be on…

— Gabrielle Union

I think our material is our lives. That's part of being a modern writer, and we have to use it.

— Anne Roiphe

“Frank: Dude. Bro. I'm not wearing underwear. Is it nippley outside?”

— Ren French

“There is no reason to hate anybody, because we came into existence, not by hate-making, but through love-making.”

— Michael Bassey Johnson

“Rivera rubbed his temples. "Satan told you to do it?" he said wearily. "No." "Elvis?" "I told you, it's supernatural.”

— Christopher Moore

“One day, scientists will overtake LIGHT and crash into the DARKNESS.”

— Paul McDermott

“I despise Wednesdays! They are the Marquis de Sade of the work week. Wednesday are so awful that...wait..what? It's Thurs? (face-palm)”

— L.G.A. McIntyre

“If you drink anymore, you're going to be positively flammable.”

— Michaela Haze

A stitch in time saves uncontrollable blood loss

— Simon Haynes

“Answering the question 'How would you like to smell?' by saying 'I'd rather I didn't' is also no longer acceptable. It's not playing the…

— David Mitchell

“The Wolf snarled, tensing his muscles, as if he wished he could climb the tree after the feline. "One day I will catch you…

— Julie Kagawa

“The table was covered with food like roast chicken, roast potatoes, roast parsnips, roast turkey, roast liquorice and, the centrepiece, a roasted knight.”

— Elias Zapple