Absurd Quote by Noah Baumbach

“I tried to knock my wife up, but she’d only let me ring the doorbell. And she made me dress up like the pizza…

— Jarod Kintz

“I told her about the time that I got so tired of you stealing the sheets that in my sleep-weary logic I decided that…

— David Levithan

“I'm worried that this is too soon. What if you get tired of having me around all the time? What if I eat your…

— Abbi Glines

“She gave me her bedroom eyes. I know because we were in the kitchen at the time. I hope we’re having pigs in a…

— Jarod Kintz

“I kept pretending to sleep. This was hard, the trailing touch at my underwear felt good. Hi fingers went into my hair at the…

— Kristen Ashley

“walked him to the door. “Is there anything else you want me to do? Check your mail? Water your plants?” “My mail is being…

— Janet Evanovich

“she rolls up a few scraps of fur into a small ball and places it under her head when she sleeps. My mate is…

— Shay Savage

“I can’t stand this, Pigeon. I feel like I’m going crazy.” I threw out my hands and let them hit my thighs. “You can’t…

— Jamie McGuire

“She used to call me on the phone and scream, “I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, I AM GOING TO CHOP YOU INTO PIECES SO…

— Scaachi Koul

“I reached my hand out and held it palm open next to hers, and after a moments hesitation she took my hand and squeezed…

— Elliott James

“My office door slams open, leaving a dent in the drywall. Here we go. “You are driving me crazy!” Her cheeks are flushed, her…

— Emma Chase

“My mate is really, really weird. She is also absolutely covered in brown, mushy clay. She laughs and holds a large lump up to…

— Shay Savage