Quote by Max Monroe

“Sure, I wouldn’t be in range to do more than dial 911 if she slipped and hit her head and fell into the water…

— Max Monroe

“Holy fucking goat scrotums!”

— Max Monroe

“But how do you know?” “Because it’s our book, Cassie. Yours and mine. This is our story, and I’ll be damned if I let…

— Max Monroe

“We were all well-off, grown-as-fuck men, but you’d be surprised by how similar we were to a group of teenage girls sometimes. “And”

— Max Monroe

“I shook my head. She didn’t respond. “See, the way phone conversations work, is that you actually have to say the words out loud.”…

— Max Monroe

“I might as well have offered up my vagina to the Museum of Natural History. Surely, it would be shown in the fossils display.…

— Max Monroe

“  Fuck you very much, Leslie. You always manage to ruin everything, but you didn’t ruin this.   Disclaimer: You are NOT the Leslie…

— Max Monroe

“Beautiful?!” I shrieked, slamming the door to my apartment behind me. The walls shook from the undeserved abuse. “For fuck’s sake, all it takes…

— Max Monroe

“I’d sign up to flip burgers at the nearest fast-food joint if it meant avoiding doing vaginal exams on my sister. The mere thought…

— Max Monroe

“The commentators are calling him Boobear?” I asked, fighting a smile. “No, I nicknamed him Boobear. He looks like a giant teddy bear. He’s…

— Max Monroe

“But what made a man was not the absence of mistakes, but rather, the way he handled them when he made them.”

— Max Monroe

“Shut your crimson lip-stain-covered trap!” Perfect.”

— Max Monroe