"On her daughter Melissa: The only time she……" — Joan Rivers
"On her daughter Melissa: The only time she really cried is when I sat her down and told her that she was not adopted."
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Joan Rivers
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245 Quotes by Joan Rivers
Joan Rivers has 245 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, 'Marry him. You'll double your wardrobe.'
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I'm so fat and I'm so depressed; last night I tried to hang myself - but the rope broke.
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We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get…
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Grandchildren can be annoying - how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo and the pig goes…
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Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief…
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I wish I could tell you it gets better. It doesn't get better. YOU get better.
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Age - it's the one mountain you can't overcome.
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I'm no cook. When I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.
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At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
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A child can be taught not to do certain things, such as touch a hot stove, pull lamps off of…
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My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it's missing, and what's there stinks.
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I must admit I am nervous about getting Alzheimer's. Once it hits, I might tell my best joke and never…
See all 245 quotes by Joan Rivers »
More Adopted Quotes
This quote is filed under Adopted Quotes,
one of 328 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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That the state of knowledge in any country will exert a directive influence on the general system of instruction adopted…
— Charles Babbage
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The uniform makes for brotherhood, since when universally adopted it covers up all differences of class and country.
— Robert Baden-Powell
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The prejudices of ignorance are more easily removed than the prejudices of interest; the first are all blindly adopted, the…
— George Bancroft
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Although all new ideas are born in France, they are not readily adopted there. It seems that they must first…
— Sarah Bernhardt
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My house is run, essentially, by an adopted, fully clawed cat with a mean nature.
— Anthony Bourdain
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I'm not Ted Nugent. My house is run, essentially, by an adopted, fully clawed cat with a mean nature. I…
— Anthony Bourdain
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In college, I think I probably positioned myself as an aspiring writer, meaning I dressed sort of extravagantly and adopted…
— Anthony Bourdain
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I separated from the Southern Baptists when they adopted the discriminatory attitude towards women, because I believe what Paul taught…
— Jimmy Carter
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I go to Malawi twice a year. It's where two of my children were adopted from, and I have a…
— Madonna Ciccone
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I would not be a good mother. I mean, I love being an aunt to my niece and nephew. And…
— Kelly Clarkson
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The making of an American begins at the point where he himself rejects all other ties, any other history, and…
— James A. Baldwin
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this last establishment will probably be within a mile of Charlottesville, and four from Monticello, if the system should be…
— Thomas Jefferson
See all 328 Adopted Quotes »