"Don't talk to me about Valentines Day. At……" — Joan Rivers
"Don't talk to me about Valentines Day. At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!"
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Joan Rivers
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245 Quotes by Joan Rivers
Joan Rivers has 245 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, 'Marry him. You'll double your wardrobe.'
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I'm so fat and I'm so depressed; last night I tried to hang myself - but the rope broke.
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We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get…
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Grandchildren can be annoying - how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo and the pig goes…
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Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief…
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I wish I could tell you it gets better. It doesn't get better. YOU get better.
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Age - it's the one mountain you can't overcome.
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I'm no cook. When I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.
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At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
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A child can be taught not to do certain things, such as touch a hot stove, pull lamps off of…
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My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it's missing, and what's there stinks.
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I must admit I am nervous about getting Alzheimer's. Once it hits, I might tell my best joke and never…
See all 245 quotes by Joan Rivers »
More Affair Quotes
This quote is filed under Affair Quotes,
one of 1,281 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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The more dubious and uncertain an instrument violence has become in international relations, the more it has gained in reputation…
— Hannah Arendt
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The proportion between the velocity with which men or animals move, and the weights they carry, is a matter of…
— Charles Babbage
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The humanitarian would, of course, have us meddle in foreign affairs as part of his program of world service.
— Irving Babbitt
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Great love affairs start with Champagne and end with tisane.
— Honore de Balzac
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I wanted to be a neurologist. That seemed to be the most difficult, most intriguing, and the most important aspect…
— Roger Bannister
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Do not measure your loss by itself; if you do, it will seem intolerable; but if you will take all…
— Saint Basil
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Happiness includes chiefly the idea of satisfaction after full honest effort. No one can possibly be satisfied and no one…
— Arnold Bennett
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I started my music career at 18 and for a long while I let other people handle my affairs.
— Sophie Ellis Bextor
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
— Ambrose Bierce
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
— Ambrose Bierce
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A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others.
— Ambrose Bierce
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Alas for the affairs of men! When they are fortunate you might compare them to a shadow; and if they…
— Aeschylus
See all 1,281 Affair Quotes »