"One time. In 1965. August, for about an……" — George Carlin
"One time. In 1965. August, for about an hour, I was both fine AND dandy at the same time. But nobody asked me how I was."
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George Carlin
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546 Quotes by George Carlin
George Carlin has 546 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is…
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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
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Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why…
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The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set…
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it…
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then…
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The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
See all 546 quotes by George Carlin »
More Asked Quotes
This quote is filed under Asked Quotes,
one of 5,201 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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Whether if soul did not exist time would exist or not, is a question that may fairly be asked; for…
— Aristotle
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If journalists ask you again and again about the same bands, you'll end up saying you hate them just because…
— Billie Joe Armstrong
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To save your world you asked this man to die; would this man, could he see you now, ask why?
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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On two occasions I have been asked, 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the…
— Charles Babbage
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No, if it was up to me every record would be brand new studio material but Atlantic records asked me…
— Sebastian Bach
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If I were asked to name the chief benefit of the house, I should say: the house shelters day-dreaming, the…
— Gaston Bachelard
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If I was asked to say what was the greatest invention of human beings, I would say the sentence.
— John Banville
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I learned the songs and played the gigs, and then they called me about a month later. They told me…
— Travis Barker
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Why have I been chosen to deliver the message of female intelligence and its divinity to a deaf world of…
— Roseanne Barr
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Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the one who asked why.
— Bernard Baruch
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Filibusters have proliferated because under current rules just one or two determined senators can stop the Senate from functioning. Today,…
— Evan Bayh
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Ever since the Greek tragedies, artists have, from time to time, asked themselves how they might influence ongoing political events.
— John Berger
See all 5,201 Asked Quotes »