"I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended…" — George Carlin
"I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it."
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George Carlin
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546 Quotes by George Carlin
George Carlin has 546 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is…
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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
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Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why…
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The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set…
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it…
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then…
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The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
See all 546 quotes by George Carlin »
More Commit Quotes
This quote is filed under Commit Quotes,
one of 1,241 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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It's frightening how easy it is to commit murder in America. Just a drink too much. I can see myself…
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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It is here, my daughters, that love is to be found - not hidden away in corners but in the…
— Teresa of Avila
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Pearl Harbor caused our Nation to wholeheartedly commit to winning World War II, changing the course of our Nation's history…
— Joe Baca
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The core issue here is that the Israeli government refuses to commit to terms of reference for the negotiations that…
— Mahmoud Abbas
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It's always seemed odd to me that after a group of terrorists commits a vile and odious deed they rush…
— Russell Baker
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All of the muscles were gone, so that was a real tough time of rebuilding all of that. But you…
— Christian Bale
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Some day science may have the existence of mankind in power, and the human race can commit suicide by blowing…
— Henry Adams
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Remember, democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts, and murders itself. There never was a democracy yet that did…
— John Adams
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Everyone knows the beautiful story of Abraham and the sacrifice of Isaac. How this noble father led his child to…
— Annie Besant
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It is much easier to repent of sins that we have committed than to repent of those that we intend…
— Josh Billings
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Every truth has two sides; it is as well to look at both, before we commit ourselves to either.
— Aesop
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Again, with two small children it's incredibly hard to commit yourself to anything because you're just getting interested in it…
— Jo Brand
See all 1,241 Commit Quotes »