"Because we were a poor area, the school……" — George Carlin
"Because we were a poor area, the school had a small budget and was unable to teach the second half of the alphabet."
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George Carlin
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546 Quotes by George Carlin
George Carlin has 546 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
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Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is…
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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
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Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why…
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The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set…
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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
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Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
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Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it…
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I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then…
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The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
See all 546 quotes by George Carlin »
More Alphabet Quotes
This quote is filed under Alphabet Quotes,
one of 182 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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I was terrible at straight items. When I wrote obituaries, my mother said the only thing I ever got them…
— Erma Bombeck
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I've always thought of the T-shirt as the Alpha and Omega of the fashion alphabet, ... The White T.
— Giorgio Armani
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Of all the achievements of the human mind, the birth of the alphabet is the most momentous.
— Frederic Goudy
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The policy of letting the child 'do what he likes' is an insidious one, since the children are encouraged to…
— Murray Rothbard
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That the universe was formed by a fortuitous concourse of atoms, I will no more believe than that the accidental…
— Jonathan Swift
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I read someplace that I used to make B-pictures. Hell, they were a lot farther down the alphabet than that…
— John Wayne
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As the component parts of all new machines may be said to be old[,] it is a nice discriminating judgment,…
— Robert Fulton
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I haven't seen someone so overmatched since Mike Tyson tried to recite the alphabet.
— Dennis Miller
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The Chess pieces are the block alphabet which shapes thoughts; and these thoughts, although making a visual design on the…
— Marcel Duchamp
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Human society, the world, and the whole of mankind is to be found in the alphabet.
— Victor Hugo
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P.S. - This is what part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R were eliminated.
— Mitch Hedberg
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It's the Roman numeral for 10. 5/5/89 is my birthday: 5 plus 5 is 10, and this is my tenth…
— Chris Brown
See all 182 Alphabet Quotes »