Liking Quote by David Foster Wallace
““For what it's worth, I accept the basic idea that parents instinctively do 'love' their offspring no matter what -- the evolutionary reasoning behind this premise is too obvious to ignore. But actually 'liking' them, or enjoying them as people, seems like a totally different thing. It may be that psychologists are off-base in their preoccupation with children's need to feel that their father or some other parent loves them. It also seems valid to consider the child's desire to feel that a parent actually likes them, as love itself is so automatic and preprogrammed in a parent that it isn't a very good test of whatever it is that the typical child feels so anxious to pass the test of.””
About This Quote
Source Essay: “Consider the Lobster,” 2004
Parents love their children instinctively, but genuine liking is distinct and not guaranteed, challenging assumptions about parental affection.
In simple terms: Parents love automatically; liking is separate.
Key Takeaway
Seek authentic connection beyond assumed love.
Themes
parental love
psychology
evolution
relationship dynamics
expectations
Mood
reflective
thoughtful
Type
philosophical
psychological
When to use this quote
- family counseling
- parent‑child communication
- self‑esteem building
Key Concepts
attachment theory
evolutionary biology
emotional authenticity
Questions to Reflect On
- Do you feel truly liked by your parents?
- How does this affect your self‑worth?
A Different Perspective
Liking may be conditional, causing child anxiety.
