Stupidity Quotes

1273 Stupidity quotes by 795 unique authors

Only when you have crossed the river can you say that the crocodile has a lump on his snout. — Ashanti
If you let that sort of thing go on, your bread and butter will be cut right out from under your feet. — Ernest Bevin
When it came to slaughtering sacred cows with such crude yet perfect musical precision, there was no one better than Frank. I wonder what songs… — Terry Gilliam
The crux... is that the vast majority of the mass of the universe seems to be missing. — William Broad
It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline. — George Lindsey
Look out! Behind you! — Ralph Waldo Emerson
If England are going to win this match, they're going to have to score a goal. — Jimmy Hill
This is going to leave a bad taste in a lot of people's eyes. — Unknown Author
One cannot be betrayed if one has no people. — Takeru Kobayashi
I'm only going one way. — Babe Ruth
If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham. — Groucho Marx
Hot oil! We need hot oil!... Forget the water balloons! — Gary Larson
This would be a better place for children if parents had to eat spinach. — Groucho Marx
If you pray hard enough, water will run uphill. How hard? Why, hard enough to make water run uphill, of course! — Robert A. Heinlein
I believe that this country's policies should be heavily biased in favor of nondiscrimination. — William J. Clinton
That's a wise substitution by Terry Venables: three fresh man, three fresh legs. — Jimmy Hill
On every commercial flight, the traveler is told, "Your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device". The question is, why doesn't the plane… — Sam Ewing
Too many piglets not enough tits. — Abraham Lincoln
The only really good vegetable is Tabasco sauce. Put Tabasco sauce in everything. Tabasco sauce is to bachelor cooking what forgiveness is to sin. The… — P.J. O'Rourke
Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and it rolls off! It's rolling all the way back to second… — Jerry Coleman

Who Wrote These Stupidity Quotes

795 authors contributed a total of 1,273 Stupidity Quotes, led by these top contributors: