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- They've outlawed the number one vegetable on the planet. — Timothy Leary
- I'm sorry... I cant get back to you right now, am currently stoned out. — Aruho Marvin
- I go to a school where the students are higher than their grades. — Alisa Gattus
- When I was a kid I inhaled frequently. That was the point. — Barack Obama
- It really puzzles me to see marijuana connected with narcotics dope and all of that stuff. It is a thousand times better… — Louis Armstrong
- Don't do drugs because if you do drugs you'll go to prison, and drugs are really expensive in prison. — John Hardwick
- Just hit the blunt one time and see if it don't change your perception on whats important in your life. — Katt Williams
- You can stump any stoner with one question: What were we just talking about? — Jim Breuer