Punch Line Quotes

34 quotes by 33 authors

Never go for the punch line. There might be something funnier on the way — Jerry Stiller
My notion of a great novel is something like a five-hundred-page shaggy-dog story, with only the punch line omitted. — Edward Abbey
If you have to do something, write me a funny AIDS play. Sure you can. It's the biggest joke played on us since sex itself… — Robert Patrick
Whenever I stumble over my own feet, or blurt out a thought that makes no sense at all, or leave the house wearing one pattern… — Paul Rudnick
When a kid can understand that a word can mean two things, there's some real thinking going on. They have a vested interest in finding… — Brian P. Cleary
I've spent my fortune, tarnished my public view and made myself the brunt of punch line after punch line. — Mindy McCready
On stage you look much larger than you are. You can have subtle changes of timing; how you place a punch line in a joke… — Sylvester McCoy
If life's a joke, then suicide's a bad punch line. — Louise Erdrich
My father who in this case was an obsessive life-long storyteller, and by a very peculiar trick of my father's. My father would tell a… — Stephen Greenblatt
Ninety-nine percent is in the delivery. If you have the right voice and the right delivery, you're cocky enough, and you pound down on the… — Buddy Hackett
I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical. — Norm MacDonald
My greatest fear is that the audience will beat me to the punch line. — David Mamet
I realized that comedians of the day were operating on jokes and punch lines. The moment you say the punch line, the audience either laughs… — Steve Martin
Cigarettes are an instant signifier in culture. It punctuates a joke, or puts that extra zing on a punch line. I like them as a… — Martha Plimpton
I don't really know what is shocking. When you tell the story of a man who is beheaded, you have to show how they cut… — Roman Polanski
In the end, perhaps we should simply imagine a joke; a long joke that's continually retold in an accent too thick and strange to ever… — Tom Robbins
A witch, a vampire, and a pixy walk into a bar, I thought as I led the way into the Squirrelâ€™s End. It was early,… — Kim Harrison
Life is a cruel, horrible joke and I am the punch line. — Carrie Fisher
Shame about how weâ€™re gonna die here, though. I mean, seriously. An Arab and a half-Jew enter a store in Tennessee. Itâ€™s the beginning of… — John Green
Ew. Someone put the dog out, "Rosalie murmured wrinkling her nose. Have you herd this one, Psycho? how do a blond's brain cells die?" She… — Stephenie Meyer

Who Wrote These Punch Line Quotes

33 authors contributed a total of 34 Punch Line Quotes, led by these top contributors: