Best Poop Quotes

77 Poop quotes by 57 unique authors

I tell a lot of fart and poop jokes. I can't help it. I have no filter, and it just comes out. — Tyler Posey
The last few years of my life have been a little like a long ride in a Poop de Ville with the bottom down. — Pat Paulsen
Spend some time observing babies. They don't work; they poop in their pants, and they have no goals other than to expand, grow and explore… — Wayne Dyer
Ram it up your poop chute. — Frank Zappa
If all you do is follow the herd, you'll just be stepping in poop all day — Wayne Dyer
Going into therapy doesn't guarantee poop on toast. — Laura Schlessinger
Harry is heavily into camping, and every year in the late fall, he makes us all go to Assateague, which is an island on the… — Dave Barry
Aside from battles, the history of nations seemed to consist of nothing but powerless old poops like myself, heavily medicated and vaguely beloved in the… — Kurt Vonnegut
Grandchildren now don't write a thank you for the Christmas presents. They are walking on their pants with their cap on backward, listening to the… — Alan K. Simpson
A baby changes your dinner party conversation from politics to poops [very pleasant thanks for that mental image Maurice!] — Unknown Author
In my world, everyone's a pony and they all eat rainbows and poop butterflies! — Dr. Seuss
I want to be remembered for my poop jokes. Those are the most important kind. — Eric Andre
The first thing I did when I decided that I was going to dive into the world of poop was look at who was doing… — Rose George
I don't flush the toilet after I poop because I'm really into marketing my brand. — Nikhil Saluja
Life is too short for hate. It eats away at your soul and distracts you from finding real happiness. Treat people you do not like,… — Bill Steinhour
Unicorns are soo magical! SO IS YOUR BIRTHDAY! They poop out rainbows!! But you make everyone smile! YOU'RE SOOOOOOO AWESOME! I'M SO SUPER HAPPY THAT… — Jasmine
Ah poop. — Patience
What I've been telling everyone that loves Carolina football is that we are going to put a team out there that, number one, is in… — Steve Spurrier
Every time I get excited I have to poop. — Snooki
When I'm out of tuna treats Waffle takes it upon herself to poop in the bathroom sink every morning to let me know shes pissed. — Audrey Kitching
I liek to poop poop poop poop — Biggie Smalls
He called the shit poop! — Billy Madison
Why are you making cupcakes when you're just gonna poop them out? — Pete Wentz
I totally miss all that stuff. Touring in a van, playing small shows, those end up being the coolest times. Sure, they were terrible at… — Pete Wentz
You mean we, like, need to poop in our pants? -Beavis — Beavis And Butthead

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Who Wrote These Poop Quotes

57 authors contributed a total of 77 Poop Quotes, led by these top contributors: