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“Bike lane: the section of the road that accommodates wide loads and has speed bumps to protect drunk drivers.” quote by Bauvard — Download Open image

““Bike lane: the section of the road that accommodates wide loads and has speed bumps to protect drunk drivers.””

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“Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion.”

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“Mom always said I was born to sit in the electric chair, but I'm proving her wrong. I'm going to die on my knees,…

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“Folk wisdom: quaint sayings of urban sophisticates compiled from the suburbs.”

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“Dentistry is a precondition to love at first sight. When your eyes meet she beams with happiness, but when you smile back she shows…

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“When it’s not enough to veto your children’s tendencies, you must in vitro them.”

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“Don't swallow: your bulging, blushing cheeks display the saliva you want to share.”

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“Moderation: a median with no means, praised by those with no misfortunes, practiced by those with no merits.”

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“The smaller the dinner table, the better the side conversation: you can gossip about the guests without fearing whether you will be overheard. It…

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“Cannibal: epicures who abstain from alcohol and tobacco. As moral guides, they are underutilized in the police forces of modern societies. ”

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“I have never sought to displease; I merely seek pleasure and avoid the pain it causes those who work to produce it. That is…

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“The amount of educational programming on television today is simply desensitizing. The only reason left to go to school is to see gun violence.”

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