Tucker Max Quotes

76 quotes in 1094 categories

• But here's the thing about being honest: All the liars HATE you for it, and most of the people in the world are liars. They…
• I try to explain to people that the only way to be cool is to be who you truly are, and the only way to…
• Things always work out for me because I do whatever I want without worrying about the consequences.
• Halloween revolves around delicious candy, excessive alcohol, and horny women dressed as sluts. This also describes my vision of Heaven.
• Ladies, you may not realize this, understand this, or even believe this, but everything else we do is ultimately for you. Men don't do anything-create…
• You know that look a cop gives you when he's so confused that he doesn't even know how to respond? If you don't know that…
• You show me a truly funny girl who doesn't have emotional issues, and I'll introduce you to my stable of unicorn thoroughbreds ridden by leprechaun…
• I love women, I love alcohol, and I love combining the two. If God invented anything better than drunk sex with a hot girl, he…
• Yes, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, but everyone forgets the second half of that quote: the road to heaven is paved…
• My path to wisdom began when I stopped pretending to know things I didn't know. When I explicitly admitted to the limits of my knowledge,…
• Great careers are getting easier to find and audition for, but harder to keep.
• That's the beauty of alcohol. If you don't remember it, it didn't happen.
• Critics stopped being relevant when they stopped writing to inform and contextualize, and when they started writing to signal who they are, to display their…
• And I’ve found that, what I now want the most in a woman is—I want a partner. I want someone who is my partner in…
• To get hwat you want out of life, all you really need to do is be honest about it, don't be afraid to go for…
• No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.
• The great stories go to those who aren't afraid to live them
• Gotta love alcohol and sex hormones.
• Due to the potent combination of my sexual recklessness and the slutty nature of some of the girls I have slept with, I have accumulated…
• Tell beautiful women they are smart, and smart women they are beautiful.

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