Shannon Thomas

“Abusive church leadership must minimize God to a puppet that can be moved around at will, and it smells of blasphemy to…

— Shannon Thomas

“Normal people don’t play all the toxic games psychological abusers do, and yet, survivors end up initially blaming themselves.”

— Shannon Thomas

“Toxic people absolutely refuse to have normal human flaws and weaknesses. They do not see themselves as average people.”

— Shannon Thomas

“Abusers get one more opportunity to covertly insult the survivor when they say, “If only…”   Toxic”

— Shannon Thomas

“Learning to not be “all in” too soon in a relationship, but remain guarded, is usually an area of growth for many…

— Shannon Thomas

“The problem is a survivor never knows when the next warm and fuzzy experience will happen, or when the next episode of…

— Shannon Thomas

“Sadly, that is exactly what happened. You were fully being yourself and the abuser was a chameleon. The abuser morphed to fit…

— Shannon Thomas

“psychological abusers damage others – not out of impaired judgement – but because they enjoy the control they gain from abusing people.”

— Shannon Thomas

“The stereotype is that only men are narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths. That is completely incorrect. There are many women who are the…

— Shannon Thomas

“When toxic church or ministry leaders feel threatened by the truth being revealed, they attack. The perfect target is the messenger of…

— Shannon Thomas

“Psychologically abusive families can never be without a targeted victim. Otherwise, they would have to look at their own individual issues and…

— Shannon Thomas

“Do all abusers care if a survivor gets to a “No more” point? Not at all. Actually, most abusers could care less,…

— Shannon Thomas

“Your loved one was authentic in his or her feelings towards the other person. However, your loved one met a con-artist. The…

— Shannon Thomas

“Abusers like to target people who have something they do not or cannot possess themselves. Narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths are notorious for…

— Shannon Thomas

“Survivors who repeatedly believe they are the problem, they are broken, and they are not good enough, are people who are never…

— Shannon Thomas

“If we have a high level of emotional capacity, it predisposes us to stay in abusive environments longer. That is not a…

— Shannon Thomas

“Some abusers on the middle-to-high end of the toxicity spectrum have absolutely no reservations about damaging survivors in any way possible, even…

— Shannon Thomas

“The stereotype is that only men are narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths. That is completely incorrect. There are many women who are the…

— Shannon Thomas

“A Psychopath will go to great lengths and take calculated steps to ensure they run you over, laugh while doing it, and…

— Shannon Thomas

“Our quality of life will be seriously impaired if we are withdrawn into isolation and lack moments of hope in our daily…

— Shannon Thomas

“The survivor delivers this message in a firm and clear tone of voice, not mad or screaming. Just stating the facts. Take…

— Shannon Thomas

“When an abuser gaslights, he or she sets up situations to make the target doubt their own memories and assessments of situations.…

— Shannon Thomas

“Some argue that there is a spectrum of what we should expect as normal human character flaws. Narcissism seems to be the…

— Shannon Thomas

“Some are quietly deteriorating the person’s self-esteem through the emotional game of abandonment. Being present physically but checked out emotionally is not…

— Shannon Thomas

“If your definition of love is wanting to see another person authentically happy and living a fulfilled life, then the answer is…

— Shannon Thomas

“The most important point is that the girl’s moods are not changing because she’s moody. She is conditioning the boy to always…

— Shannon Thomas

“Realizing toxic people are not actually insecure is one of the hardest concepts for survivors because thinking toxic people struggle with insecurities…

— Shannon Thomas

“There is no way someone could ever convince me that narcissists, sociopaths, and psychopaths are clueless about their behaviors. The level at…

— Shannon Thomas

“Each one of us is more likely to believe someone when they point out our flaws and can connect what we know…

— Shannon Thomas

“What I am saying is that your hope of the person being better someday must come to an abrupt end. When that…

— Shannon Thomas

“Frequently, the emotional homicide is happening while other people go on clamoring about what a great guy or gal the abuser is…

— Shannon Thomas

“They also highlight the fact that a psychologically abusive person has no moral compass and is more than willing to use innocent…

— Shannon Thomas

“When we decide that boundaries are needed, they can be hard to set – and maintain – if we doubt ourselves and…

— Shannon Thomas

“After a survivor of psychological abuse has identified their Despair (Stage One), Educated themselves on the specifics of psychological abuse (Stage Two),…

— Shannon Thomas

“This is because in the legalistic church, God (or pronounced “Gawd” if you’re in the southern regions of the country) is coming…

— Shannon Thomas

“Toxic people have an incredible ability to triangulate their helpers into abusing survivors. This is done on purpose so the toxic person’s…

— Shannon Thomas

“Some people wonder if abusers can feel love or affection for their targets. The answer to that depends on your own definition…

— Shannon Thomas

“Many people wonder how psychological abuse and emotional abuse differ. Are they perhaps the same thing? For me, they are two distinctly…

— Shannon Thomas

“Facing the truth about those we have loved (e.g., our parents, siblings, a treasured friend, or a spiritual leader) is unbelievably hard,…

— Shannon Thomas

“Toxic people cannot sustain any length of relationship connection (i.e., the good days). As mentioned before, their lack of healthy attachments while…

— Shannon Thomas