Best Penn Jillette Sayings
- A joke is a way to say, 'I'm going to do something funny now. If I don't get a laugh at the end, I'm a… End
- A two-party system is way too good for those two parties. Good
- As much as I disagreed with every second of 'Fahrenheit 9/11,' the fact that it is out made me jump for joy. Disagreed
- Asking someone else to do something immoral is immoral. Asking
- Barack Obama is way smarter than Bush - so way, way smarter than me. Obama is way more charismatic than me. Barack
- Bob Barr is not crazy enough for my taste. Barr
- Bob Saget is the dirtiest comic who's ever lived. Nobody touches him. Bob
- Cars mean nothing to me. I'm not a car guy. Car
- 'Celebrity Apprentice' has more integrity and is the most straightforward show I've ever seen. Apprentice
- Charities are really good. To a certain extent, the ones you pick are arbitrary. Arbitrary
- Comedy is taken care of by a free market. Care
- Counterintuitive action makes a fellow feel smart. Action
- Counterintuitive actions prove we can trust real knowledge and do the opposite of what we feel makes sense. Action
- Democracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It's just ganging up against the weird kid, and I'm always the weird kid. Democracy
- Direct confrontation, direct conversation is real respect. And it's amazing how many people get that. Amazing
- Don't waste too much time wishing, hoping, and being envious; it'll make you bugnutty. Bugnutty
- Even if I disagree with Obama on many, many things, he is certainly qualified to be president. He is certainly competent to be president. Competent
- Every nut who kills people has a Bible lying around. Bible
- Every poker player is smarter than me. Every Poker
- Everybody prefers to see a nut - they're more fascinating. Everybody
- For better or worse, in the 21st century, reality shows are the variety show. Better
- For the most part, any serious magic show is not using very much technology newer than theatrical lights. Any
- I believe in individual rights so much that I don't like any sort of 'what's good for the cause'-type questions. Any
- I believe very much that the most damning thing you can say about Muslims is that you're afraid to say anything because they'll hurt you. Afraid
- I came to magic absolutely hating magic on a very, very deep level. Absolutely
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