Kinky Friedman Quotes
95 quotes
in 1022 categories
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I'll tell you right now. I'm for prayer in school.
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Wandering around back stage at a willie Nelson concert is a bit like being the parrot on the shoulder of the guy who's running the…
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I rarely meddled in the cat's personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute human emotions to…
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Seventeen publishers rejected the manuscript, at which time we knew we had something pretty hot.
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You don't accomplish much by swimming with the mainstream. Hell, a dead fish can do that.
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I was so high, I needed a stepladder to scratch my own ass.
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The art of writing fiction is to sail as dangerously close to the truth as possible without sinking the ship
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I'm not afraid to live. I'm not afraid to fail. I'm not afraid to succeed. I'm not afraid to fall in love. I'm not afraid…
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Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get,
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I have a better head of hair than Rick Perry; it's just not in a place I can show you.
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Poly means more than one, and ticks are bloodsucking parasites.
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You never marry the person you first see 'Casablanca' with.
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If you elect me the first Jewish justice of the peace, I'll reduce the speed limits to 54.95!
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Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
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When a stray animal crosses your path, it may be as close to God as you're going to get in this lifetime.
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Jerry Jones and Chris Christie are probably the most important latent homosexual relationship since Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson.
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Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart, and... both of them were independents, by the way.
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They probably would've taken Jesus if he hadn't been nailed down.
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God created whiskey to keep the Irish from taking over the world.
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An editor's job is to take something great and make it good.
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