John Alejandro King Aka The Covert Comic Quotes

54 quotes in 466 categories

• Whether it's SFW depends on your W.
• The fact that toast always lands buttered side down would be a blessing if you kept your floor covered in marmalade.
• In the Photoshop of life, some of us need sharpening, some of us need resizing, and some of us need a whole lot of negative…
• If you want to read the fortune, you've got to break the cookie.
• Birds don't sing after a storm, they sing before the next one.
• I may be human scum, but damn it, I'm still scum.
• Flattery will get me nowhere? That's a hell of a lot better than the place I am now.
• A stone trips you. A daisy reaches up and pulls you down.
• In a tissue paper jungle, the paper tiger is justly feared.
• Those who complain that it's lonely at the top never invite you up there to keep them company.
• Whatever happened to that moment called NOW?
• To everyone else, I'm the happiest person in the world. But deep down inside, I'm really only the 12th happiest person in the world.
• Is it that a lot of stuff looks like the Virgin Mary, or that the Virgin Mary looks like a lot of stuff?
• Past, present, future: a collusion to perpetuate a delusion for the sake of an illusion.
• Don't try this at home. Do this at home, or do this at home not, there is no try.
• Always write your signature move in disappearing ink.
• If you want it to be heard, don't shout it from the rooftops, whisper it in the basement.
• The question isn't whether it's SFW, the question is whether W is SF it.
• From a Twitter post on why food is better than people: 'Bagels don't talk about you behind your back.' ... Since WHEN???
• Whatever doesn't kill me makes me stronger. Now if I could just find something that doesn't kill me.

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