Gary Reilly

“When I was in college I had a wisdom tooth pulled, and I was given a prescription for a bottle of narcotic…

— Gary Reilly

“I hate competition. It’s one of the seven warning signs of work. I’ve spent most of my life trying to figure out…

— Gary Reilly

“For the past few weeks I have been laboring under the assumption that if people thought I was dead, they would stop…

— Gary Reilly

“I began to parse the sentence. This is what English majors do. It's what we're trained to do. We don't know how…

— Gary Reilly

One thing I had learned in college was that if you ever had a question about truth, reality, or the meaning of…

— Gary Reilly

I guided my heap into the heart of Capitol Hill wondering for the first time in fourteen years what I could do…

— Gary Reilly

Adverbs and cops always come in pairs.

— Gary Reilly

“They paid people to write books!!! Until that moment I had a vague idea that books were produced in factories, like tires,…

— Gary Reilly

“I wandered the sidewalk watching all the street performers doing their juggling acts, playing their musical instruments, busting their asses to avoid…

— Gary Reilly

I was in the land of fakes and frauds and phonies-I felt like saying “Howdy cousin,” to everybody who walked by.

— Gary Reilly

“I expected Los Angeles to be slick and modern, but overall it had a rundown look and feel to it. Sort of…

— Gary Reilly

I've been broke, and I've been in debt, and broke is better.

— Gary Reilly

... occasionally I see rich-looking women on Rollerblades gripping leashes and being towed bodily by golden retrievers. That's my kind of jogging.

— Gary Reilly

She looked confused. She looked off-balance. That's a technique I employ to get dates, and it always works.

— Gary Reilly

“The difference between a regular Catholic education and a Jesuit education is the difference between the army and the marines.”

— Gary Reilly

That was how I was going to get things back to normal-by working. I never thought I would use the words “working”…

— Gary Reilly

“I had long ago learned that books are the best presents you can buy for a person--except me. I like toys. But…

— Gary Reilly

My big dream back then was to buy an IBM Selectric. I still have that dream. I really ought to buy a…

— Gary Reilly

A lot of artists start out as failed poets, then move on to being failed short-story writers before they finally break through…

— Gary Reilly

“I don’t know why the publishers in New York don’t take a tip from Hollywood and just publish the outlines of novels…

— Gary Reilly

“There was a little optometrist shop on south Broadway tucked in between a pizza joint and what amounted to a head shop…

— Gary Reilly

“You must be compelled by an inner force to read books, listen to music, and view films which serve only to send…

— Gary Reilly

“When I was a teenager, most fathers tended to go berserk when I asked their daughters on a date.... I discovered that…

— Gary Reilly

“I don’t know why anybody does anything in the winter. I always say, if you want to do something, move to Phoenix.”

— Gary Reilly

“I hate it when I get mad at myself because it's impossible to turn on my heel and walk away in a…

— Gary Reilly