Daniel Handler Quotes

495 quotes in 5123 categories

• But we can also ask for something we are much more likely to get, and that is to find a person or two, somewhere in…
• This feeling is not unlike the sinking in one's stomach when one is in an elevator that suddenly goes down, or when you are snug…
• Everything else has vanished, so you take them now. Maybe if you're the one keeping them, I'll be the one feeling better.
• My chauffer once told me that I would feel better in the morning, but when I woke up the two of us were still on…
• Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you…
• Here we are at the bottom, almost empty. It's like confetti, these dried remnants you find in the street for a party no one invited…
• All his life, Klaus had believed that if you read enough books, you could solve any problem, but now he wasn't so sure.
• I am certain that over the course of your own life, you have noticed that people's rooms reflect their personalities. In my room, for instance,…
• Hello, freaky peoples!
• There was still plenty of water in the basement, and I felt it soaking me from the knees on down. If someone wanted to torture…
• There is a pair of snakes who have learned to drive a car so recklessly that they would run you over in the street and…
• Waiting is one of life's hardships. It is hard enough to wait for chocolate cream pie while burnt roast beef is still on your plate.…
• When somebody is a little bit wrong - say, when a waited puts nonfat milk in your espresso macchiato, instead of lowfat milk - it…
• Klaus sighed, and opened a book, and as at so many other times when the middle Baudelaire child did not want to think about his…
• This is an absurd moral, for you and I both know that sometimes not only is it good to lie, it is necessary to lie.
• For Beatrice - you will always be in my mind, in my heart and in your grave.
• Sometime during your life—in fact, very soon—you may find yourself reading a book, and you may notice that a book’s first sentence can often tell…
• To Beatrice- My love flew like a butterfly Until death swooped down like a bat As the poet Emma Montana McElroy said: 'That's the end…
• This knowledge sits in my heart, heavy as a paperweight.
• Appearance matters a great deal because you can often tell a lot about people by looking at how they present themselves.

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