There's nothing better than just staring at a buttercup, struggling to make an impact on the world. — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
If you want the best audience, make your way up North to be honest. — Bob Mortimer Audience Copy Share Image
I have always been a bit of a recluse, but I really was after the heart thing. And everyone knew. — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
I'm not a fan of stand-up comedy, personally. But some of them are incredibly skilled. — Bob Mortimer Comedy Copy Share Image
There are a lot of famous people who started out with us and became stars and I wouldn't swap my life with… — Bob Mortimer Astronomy Copy Share Image
It can be very lonely knowing that you have things to say but you daren't say them. Knowing that you could contribute… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
Throughout my entire three years at Sussex I never spoke to another law student. I talked in tutorials but as soon as… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
There is a theory in showbiz circles that mentally you remain the same age as when you first tasted fame, and I… — Bob Mortimer Age Copy Share Image
There are quite detailed rules with sitcom. When people can leave scenes, act structure, joke rhythm. You can't not have a straight… — Bob Mortimer Joke Copy Share Image
We've always been a slightly specialist interest, and as you get older, for specialist interest programmes I think broadcasters are probably looking… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
When you have a house full of children, there's never a quiet moment, so I like getting out in the garden for… — Bob Mortimer Children Copy Share Image
When I was about 13, I went to see this band called Free, who I'd never heard, and I just fell in… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
I worked in a chicken factory, in a steel foundry, I worked on the bins for a year or so. It started… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
I played for Middlesbrough's youth team. At the age of 16, I went into a shed at the training ground and was… — Bob Mortimer Age Copy Share Image
The more cynical commentators on our careers would say that the northern accent has been the basis of our success. There's a… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
I don't feel scared about death, I just feel so frustrated and sad to think I won't see how stories end. My… — Bob Mortimer Children Copy Share Image
I can't remember ever cooking food to impress a woman. The idea's quite cheesy and sort of makes my skin crawl. But… — Bob Mortimer Cats Copy Share Image
I sometimes wonder, with the Oxbridge comics, the broadcasters seem to say, at some point, now I trust you to do a… — Bob Mortimer Documentary Copy Share Image
When they told me I had to have a heart operation, my main memory is standing in my kitchen and thinking what… — Bob Mortimer Doctor Copy Share Image
Comedy, if it didn't save my life, certainly gave me a very different life. — Bob Mortimer Comedy Copy Share Image
We miss 'House of Fools' a lot. It felt a bit like a different and fresh show for British TV. — Bob Mortimer British Copy Share Image
That's the thing, you see, we were never good enough to write proper punchlines. — Bob Mortimer Comedy Copy Share Image
I've started to get iritis, which affects the eyes. But I'm not going to give in. — Bob Mortimer Eyes Copy Share Image
It's like cooks don't watch cooking programmes - I suppose maybe comedians don't watch comedy shows. — Bob Mortimer Comedians Copy Share Image
Other people just look so comfortable with a book in their hands - I never feel like that. — Bob Mortimer Book Copy Share Image
House of Fools,' that was the first thing I was sad that we couldn't do any more. — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
I love 'Big Brother.' I adore it. What can I say. It just suits me fine. — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
I had three bypasses in one go, using arteries harvested from my leg and the right side of my chest. — Bob Mortimer Doctor Copy Share Image
When you've had a heart thing, a lot of the problems are psychological. — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
Laughter is the only currency I've really ever known. Ever since I was a boy. — Bob Mortimer Comedy Copy Share Image
I remember when I worked at the solicitor's - you'd go in, talk to your mates for a bit and then get… — Bob Mortimer Copy Share Image
