Anger Quote by Albert Ellis
““Another major difference between anger and other emotions results in what we call the angry person’s paradox. When we experience depression, guilt, shame, or anxiety, we usually upset ourselves about something that we think we did or some characteristic we have that we think is the cause of our disturbed emotion. As a result we try to change ourselves. However, anger usually involves the externalizing of blame. When we become angry, we usually consider the source of our anger to be outside ourselves. We would not be angry if other people did not do the stupid things they do. If we think the causes of anger are outside ourselves, the solution to our anger problems appears to us to be changes other people have to make. If the external cause of our anger is not going to change, we remain trapped in our rage.””
About This Quote
Source Book: Reason and Emotion in Psychotherapy, Albert Ellis, 1977
Anger differs from other emotions because we blame others and expect them to change, leading to a feeling of helplessness if they don’t.
In simple terms: Anger blames others, causing frustration when they don’t change.
Key Takeaway
Recognize personal agency in anger triggers.
Themes
emotions
personal responsibility
psychology
Mood
frustrated
reflective
Type
advice
psychological
insightful
When to use this quote
- relationship conflict
- workplace disputes
- personal setbacks
- social injustice
Key Concepts
cognitive therapy
externalization
Questions to Reflect On
- What can you control in an angry situation?
- How might shifting blame affect your emotional health?
A Different Perspective
If external causes stay unchanged, anger may persist despite introspection.
