I want to really take chances. I want to be funny in a lot of different ways. I'd like to be great.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you want to prevent abortions, you make sure everyone has health care, a high school education and birth control. Not the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When you make drama you are like Picasso. Drama is whatever you want it to be. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I'm in show business... I want to hang out with Janet Jackson, not Jesse Jackson. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think all the funny people were bullied. When they talk about outlawing bullying, it's like, what? You want no Comedy Central? — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
People want what they want. And I guess that is a reason we have this big credit card problem and a lot… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
The government doesn't want you to use YOUR drugs, they want you to use THEIR drugs. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
They don't want you to vote. If they did, we wouldn't vote on a Tuesday. In November. You ever throw a party… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I never really write the jokes. I just sit down over a week or two and try to figure out what I… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle down eventually? Because you don't want to be the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You want to track Hollywood careers, look in the real estate section. You see a guy buy a house that costs $6… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
When you make comedy, you make it for the people and you try to have as many screenings and as many tests… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
You know the world's gone mad when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep. And when I see the Tea Party and all this stuff,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
The only plan I have is to not do anything I don't want to do - and to never work just for… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I want my name to be a brand in comedy. I hope my name stands for comedic excellence. — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
The thing about having an audience right there laughing is that critics can write what they want, but the proof is right… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
My mother is the kind of woman you don't want to be in line behind at the supermarket. She has coupons for… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Black History Month is in the shortest month of the year, and the coldest-just in case we want to have a parade — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I realized with Broadway everything written for black people is usually written in the past, and I'm kind of a contemporary guy.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I don't write jokes first. I write down topics. I think of what I want to talk about, and then I write… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
It's like, hmm, there's people with $2000 weaves that could have bought health care with that weave money. They don't have insurance.… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Jokes rot. They're not like songs. I always envy singers - Sting is always going to sing 'Roxanne'. But people want to… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I used to have horrible cars that would always end up broken down on the highway. When I tried to flag someone… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
People basically aren't that racist. They want their laughs. If I make a white guy laugh, he's gonna come see me. He's… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I get approached to do shows all the time. There's a lot of money in sitcoms, but I've never been the kind… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I'm looking forward to not being tired around my child. My father was tired a lot. I want to play ball with… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
I think if I were to get as big as I could get, it does change your mind-state. I think like the… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Kids raised on a culture of ‘We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.’… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Right now, my job is that I'm like an ambulance chaser. I've got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them. — Chris Rock Copy Share
If you live with a single parent, you don't see compromise. You witness a grown person living in a world where they do what… — Chris Rock Copy Share
Nobody ever says, 'Hey daddy, thanks for knockin' out this rent.' 'Hey daddy, I sure love this hot water.' 'Hey daddy, it's easy to… — Chris Rock Copy Share
You know the world is messed up when the tallest man in the NBA is Chinese, the best golfer is black, and the best… — Chris Rock Copy Share
You can't think the thoughts you want to think if you think you're being watched. — Chris Rock Copy Share
There's not one reference in that thing that doesn't play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking… — Chris Rock Copy Share
My mother got sick when I was rich. And my mother, you know … I don’t really want to get into it, but my… — Chris Rock Copy Share
Here's the thing. When we talk about race relations in America or racial progress, it's all nonsense. There are no race relations. White people… — Chris Rock Copy Share
I was raised to believe that you had to do things better than white people in order to succeed. The old black shows were… — Chris Rock Copy Share
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies... a man's lie is, "I'm at Tony house, I was at Kenny house!" A woman… — Chris Rock Copy Share
You can't fake comedy - it's not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face. — Chris Rock Copy Share
All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only through love… — Chris Rock Copy Share
