I walk into a Home Depot and it's like everything in there needs assembly. I start hyperventilating. I need the inhaler. — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I went a nutritionist... I walk into his office he goes, 'Well, the good news is, you can have all the salad you want.' I don't want any salad! He wanted me to eat salad. As a food! — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I made $225.81 a week as an accountant, and I went to $400 a week as a stand-up. I was up to $800 a… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I was an accountant for six months, and for the last three, I didn't do much work. — John Pinette Copy Share Image
All I'm really doing is talking about going on diets and... just about being a big guy. Why should that be any different from… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
My philosophy in life is just to laugh as much as possible through the good and the bad - to laugh at the tragedies… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I'm one of the larger mammals. Everyone in my family was large, mom and dad, my two older sisters. If you meet a skinny… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
The guy who made the shoes for 'Hairspray' said putting shoes on me was like putting a pump on a ham. I found out… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I started off doing impressions. It was a comfortable way to get started. — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I want to talk about being a big guy... it's not a fat joke. It's a joke about living the way you live. — John Pinette Copy Share Image
I'd done the movie 'The Punisher,' and Travolta was in that, though we didn't have scenes together. We met at the premiere and he's… — John Pinette Copy Share Image
