“Writing Vampire Erotica is like writing sex scenes for porcupines.” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“SEN. McCARTHY: You will teach morality, ethics, and good house-keeping to these 48 states, and to the world. By order of this committee, June… — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“Some people, when there’s a threat of everything they have being ripped away at a moments notice, they place value on the things they… — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“JUNE: My mother always said, “Why should a man buy a cow when he can get the milk for free?” WARD: I don’t think… — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“I’ve spent half my night lugging a three-ton slab of asshole up a gazillion stairs.” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“I’m not about to let somebody stick a Bissel vacuum attachment up my cootch.” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“When I was a kid, they had a saying, 'to err is human but to really fuck it up takes a computer.’ ” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“Oh Ward, you animal. It gets me so hot and squishy when you call it intercourse.” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“That’s right you little fucktart, she thought. Time to eat shit and die.” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
“On a wing and a prayer." (After being asked how the angels make love in Milton's Paradise Lost).” — Benjamin R. Smith Copy Share Image
