What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing - but it let out a little whine. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I always make the wrong decisions so I have something to tweet about. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The only thing Facebook and Twitter have in common is that you're able to block annoying fuckin' users. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WOMAN, LIBERATED, a female who has sex before marriage and a job after. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Lipstick (lip*stik) n. -- On your lips, color to enhance your beauty. On his collar, color only a tramp would wear! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Well, crying isn't gonna bring him back, unless your tears smell like dog food. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You are loving... when your own pain does not blind you to the pain of others. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Twitter: Where people bitch for everyone's attention and validation from strangers. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Twitter makes me want to have drinks with people I've never met, and Facebook makes me want to throw drinks at people… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My Friend dumped his GF last night. To make her feel better, I gave her company in her shower today & BITCH… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Regarding jam sessions: jazz musicians are the only workers I can think of who are willing to put in a full shift… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
