Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. I'm thankful for all of you. I am not thankful for the pilgrims. Buckles should never be on hats. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
My first concern is that when you go to a show, you should be present. It's much more exciting to put the… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
I love you just the way you are but you don't see you like I do. You shouldn't try so hard to… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
Comedy should be a source of positivity. I don't want to bully people, and I don't want people to come to my… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
I believe, firmly, that women are always right. Ah, I should actually rephrase that: I... don't. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
Humour is often linked to shared experience. Like, a guy gets up and says, Have you noticed public restrooms have really inefficient… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
The strange thing with Wikipedia is that the first article that ever gets written about you will define your Wikipedia page forever. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
“Well, man, you know what they say." No, I don't. I don't know what they say. I don't even know who they are. Who… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
At one point when I was very young, when I was first starting out, I thought, 'Well, one day I'll be able to put… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
And there's a metal train that's a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her, How long til it… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
I do think that stand-up comedy in general heavily favors masculinity and so I like to act a little feminine onstage. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
I write about what I know: teenage dating, overly charged sexuality, all the things that make you uncomfortable. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
People give me money and I don't know why, my real collection plate is an empty cup held by a homeless guy. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
Comedy doesn't really matter that much; I know that. I treat it like an adult - I don't treat it like a child or… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
I've always liked the format of YouTube, sharing things for free, which is a nice exchange between people. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
Comedy is very strange to me and I don't fully understand it's purpose or function. — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
