Redneck Quotes by Jeff Foxworthy · Page 2

You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You just may be a redneck if your lawn furniture used to be your living room furniture.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your sophisticated show-biz cousin is a rodeo clown.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House…

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your beer can collection is considered a tourist attraction in your home town.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If you think the last four words to the national anthem are " gentleman, start your engines", You might be a redneck.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if when you run out of gas, you put gin in the gas tank.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...your family tree doesn't fork.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your wife has a beer belly and you find it attractive.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if the antenna on your truck is a danger to low flying airplanes.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if...your belt buckle weighs more than three pounds.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You may be a redneck if... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If you think fast food is hittin a deer att 65 miles per hr.. you might be a redneck

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If you've ever made change in the offering plate, you might be a redneck.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if the hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your 'huntin dog' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.

— Jeff Foxworthy

If your biggest tax deduction was bail money, you might be a redneck.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.

— Jeff Foxworthy

You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

— Jeff Foxworthy