“The saddest thing is a little girl who is told by her own mother and father that she will never be pretty. And then they open the front door, and on the porch is a little white suitcase, with all… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“If you think about it even medium-hard, launching a scared little dog into space with no intention of getting it back is a seriously… — chris onstad Copy Share Image
“I was glad to have the opportunity, but now I am glad to be rid of it. The constant violence, or the impending threat… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“He threw on a cardigan and some track pants and tried to say a goodbye that meant come back again.” — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“The saddest thing is an old bag lady, freezing to death in the snow on Christmas Eve, and the last thing she sees is… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“YOU GONNA STAND THERE WITH YOUR BUTT ON THE BACK OF YOUR BODY OR ARE YOU GONNA GET IN ON THIS, BEEF?” — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“I wish in the past I had tried more things 'cause now I know that being in trouble is a fake idea.” — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“The saddest thing is a retarded man who is crying and promising a broken egg that it will still be a chicken some day.… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“The saddest thing is when the toilet from an abandoned space station falls back to earth, lands upside-down on a child who was playing… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“College is just a place where they let you pay them to tell you things you should be getting paid to learn on the… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
“It's kind of like... It's kind of like playin' a basketball game. I am there and the other player is there, and it's just… — Chris Onstad Copy Share Image
