“Because when push comes to shove, we really don't want to have sex with our friends... unless they're sexy. And sometimes we do want to have sex with our blackhearted, soul-sucking enemies... assuming they're sexy.” — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
The only people who think the Internet is a calamity are people whose lives have been hurt by it; the only people who insist… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
“I suppose we'll never know what really happened in that room, though he did tell police, "I did it because I'm a dirty dog."… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
Do you know people who insist they like 'all kinds of music'? That actually means they like no kinds of music. — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
Let's say Twitter existed during the Civil War. We would have a better understanding of people in the Confederacy who were against slavery, people… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
All my friends are rock critics, so we talk about rock criticism a lot. Because of that, in order to be part of the… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
If rain is God crying, I think God is drunk and his girlfriend just slept with Zeus. — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
But no matter how many times we re-rank the presidents, in another 200 years, the top presidents will still be Washington and Lincoln and… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
Different critics go to different lengths to disagree with that sentiment, but ultimately, they're the person experiencing this art, and whatever judgment or taste… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
First, you must love yourself. And if you do that convincingly enough, others will love you too much. — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
Anyone who claims to be good at lying is obviously bad at lying. Thus - as a writer myself - I cannot comment on… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
“I care about strangers when they're abstractions but feel almost nothing when they are literally in front of me. They seem like unnamed characters… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
“Toby Keith writes songs like 1993's "Should've Been a Cowboy," and what's compelling is that you can't deconstruct its message. "Should've Been a Cowboy"… — Chuck Klosterman Copy Share Image
