I can see getting married and having a family, because it is the next thing on the agenda. You can only do this for so long. I'm old, and my friends all have kids. And I'm single, still blow drying… — David Spade Copy Share Image
I talk to my dad all the time, he's more like my buddy than my father, and he's not happy that I use him… — David Spade Copy Share Image
“I’d tell her to come over at 10 A.M. and she’d roll in at 10:45 with a Starbucks going “The fucking 405 was nuts… — David Spade Copy Share Image
My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators. — David Spade Copy Share Image
Gossip is a plague that consumes weak, gullible people and blinds them from the truth of reality; it can devour entire city's. I prefer… — David Spade Copy Share Image
A friend of Nicole Ritchie told the New York Post that Nicole is definitely pregnant. — David Spade Copy Share Image
Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good. — David Spade Copy Share Image
On Sundays, I lay low, sulk a lot, and try to get my head together for next week. — David Spade Copy Share Image
I have no stories to sell. A lot of my relationships are with civilians, and no one wants to hear about those. — David Spade Copy Share Image
When I started I'd fly across the country to do a gig for a hundred bucks. — David Spade Copy Share Image
In grade school I was smart, but I didn't have any friends. In high school, I quit being smart and started having friends. — David Spade Copy Share Image
I want to get back to my fighting weight of 98 pounds. I have the exact measurements of that guy from the movie, Powder.… — David Spade Copy Share Image
