Where else but in America can a poor black man like Michael Jackson grow up to be a rich white woman? — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Sonny Von Bulow, who said to her husband Claus on their honeymoon, Stop needling me. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Dolly Parton, who said to her doctor, Are you sure it's a chest cold? Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Adam, who said to our Lord in the Garden of Eden, I got more ribs - you got more broads? Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Joe Torre, who switched to first base because he didn't want to go through life as Chicken Catcher Torre. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Eve said to the serpent, “You know I could go for a bite to eat, but I don't know you from Adam.” — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Goliath's mother, who said to Goliath, Stop running around with David! You're always coming home stoned! Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Simon Peter, who embarrassed the other disciples at the Last Supper by asking for seconds. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Jacques Cousteau, the last man to see Jimmy Hoffa. Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Amelia Earhart, who said, Stop looking for me; see if you can find my luggage! Never got a dinner! — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
Steven Spielberg's mother, who said to E.T., I don't care where you're from, you're here and you're gonna get bar mitzvahed! Never got a… — Red Buttons Copy Share Image
