Ifs Quotes by Ron Luciano

No one ever grew up intending to be an umpire, except perhaps my friend Bill Haller. His brother Tom wanted to be a catcher,…

— Ron Luciano

The practical joke is the psychiatry of baseball.

— Ron Luciano

Being an umpire is like being a king. It prepares you for nothing.

— Ron Luciano

Throwing people out of a game is like learning to ride a bicycle--once you get the hang of it, it can be a lot…

— Ron Luciano

If it's true you learn from your mistakes, Jim Frey will be the best manager ever

— Ron Luciano

Any umpire who claims he has never missed a play is . . . well, an umpire.

— Ron Luciano

Lou Piniella only argues on days ending with the letter 'y'.

— Ron Luciano

Umpire's heaven is a place where he works third base every game. Home is where the heartache is.

— Ron Luciano

I never called a balk in my life. I didn't understand the rule.

— Ron Luciano

One reason I never called balks is that I never understood the rule.

— Ron Luciano

Umpiring is best described as the profession of standing between two seven-year olds with one ice cream cone.

— Ron Luciano

“Never being a person satisfied to create a small disaster when I could just as easily create a catastrophe, I realized I was about…

— Ron Luciano