“Something must have happened, your mother speculated. In her mind a woman with no child could only be explained by vast untrammeled… — Junot Díaz Copy Share Image
If the writing is good, then the writing is already funny. All you have to do is make this funny writing true… — Constance Wu Copy Share Image
“The lieutenant’s fooling around again with the telegraph girl at the station,” said the corporal, after he had gone. “He’s been running… — Jaroslav Hašek Copy Share Image
“Unless... " Now he looked at her in surprise. "Unless what?" She jabbed a finger at his shoulder. "When did you get… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When people make their usernames be like a cruse word , calling themself sexy ,and what not you gotta wonder what are… — MrCountry Copy Share Image
I try to look on the sunny side of life. If something dramatic happens to me, I always try to recount it… — Suzanne Shaw Copy Share Image
“How I should despise such a thing if I were a man. What a nose she has! what a chin! what a… — John Vanbrugh Copy Share Image
The people I grew up around who I really liked were quick on the draw. It always just wowed me. And my… — Drew Barrymore Copy Share Image
“Adam's response was buried in the sound of the first-story door falling open. Noah slouched in. In a wounded tone, he said,… — Maggie Stiefvater Copy Share Image
I think comedy and satire are a very important part of democracy, and it's important we are able to laugh at the… — Rory Bremner Copy Share Image
“You think you’re a pretty funny guy, don’t you?” “Well, I don’t want to brag…” “You know what’s really funny?” Geryon asks,… — Dark Calling Copy Share Image
“Zane raised his brow. “Didn’t I say that yesterday?” he asked, forcing himself to be patient. Somehow. “You say that like you… — Abigail Roux & Madeleine Urban Copy Share Image
“Smartass Disciple: Master, do you really believe in the second chance? Master of Stupidity: That supports the basis of lost-then-found concept.” — Toba Beta Copy Share Image
When I was 10 there wasnt trampolines and cartoon charaters, I never went to Chuck E Cheese! My mom said ' you… — George Lopez Copy Share Image
We sit in a room, laugh, and all come up with comedy situations, which we work out. Sometimes we cross the line,… — Joe Gatto Copy Share Image
So there I was lying in the gutter. A man stopped and asked '"What's the matter? Did you fall over?" So I… — Chic Murray Copy Share Image
Be strong, believe in freedom and in God, love yourself, understand your sexuality, have a sense of humor, masturbate, don't judge people… — Madonna Ciccone Copy Share Image
“I chose the San Francisco earthquake because it's very interesting- although maybe that isn't the word you'd have used if you'd actually… — Belinda Hollyer Copy Share Image
One of my favorite things about 'Star Trek' wasn't just the overt banter but the humor in that show about the relationships… — J. J. Abrams Copy Share Image
“A Provider is not a magician. He cannot wave a magic wand and produce a perfect product—solutions take time and effort to… — Dmytro Zaporozhtsev Copy Share Image
I look to nature because I think the animals are smarter than we are. Animals mate; humans date. There's no dating in… — Adam Ferrara Copy Share Image
It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
I have spiritual beliefs that I could literally go out and make an entire comedy routine about, and tour as some sort… — Jim Carrey Copy Share Image
“You know, the most amazing thing happened to me tonight... I saw a car with the license plate ARW 357. Can you… — Richard P. Feynman Copy Share Image
TV is easier: it's all planned out for you and the audience is there to see a show and they are all… — Drew Carey Copy Share Image
“Most people assumed Aaron was gay just because he was on the cheerleading squad. I, on the other hand, assumed a guy… — Stacey Jay Copy Share Image
At some point you do not need to talk to have a conversation. The conversation exists whether you have it or not.… — Chris Bachelder Copy Share Image
“Another field agent raised his hand. "I guess I've slacked off a bit because it seems no matter how many citations we… — Hog Heaven Copy Share Image
I'm afraid that the act of writing is so scary and anxiety-filled that I never laugh at all. In fact, when people… — Cynthia Ozick Copy Share Image
I am myself sometimes, and I do state my opinions, but not in a comedy routine and not in my character. There… — Ricky Gervais Copy Share Image
“Now pastor Jón Prímus laughed. Philosophy and theology have no effect on him, much less plain common sense. Impossible to convince this… — Halldór Laxness Copy Share Image
I rang the bell of this small bed-and breakfast place, whereupon a lady appeared at an outside window. "What do you want?",… — Chic Murray Copy Share Image
“Academics love the semicolon; their hankering after logic demands a division which is more emphatic than a comma, but not quite as… — Victor Klemperer Copy Share Image
“Pam was a struggling artist who made everyone's life difficult. She only wore black and after becoming acquainted with her I couldn't… — Bob Smith Copy Share Image
Bryzgalov isn’t just a running comedy act. He’s one of the league’s most thoughtful players and the fact that he offers the… — Ilya Bryzgalov Copy Share Image
In Canadian comedy, you'll almost never see guns. If you bring a gun into a scene, it's like, 'Whoa! Wow, how are… — Scott Thompson Copy Share Image
“She seemed glad to see me. In fact, she actually said she was glad to see me – a statement no other… — P.G.Wodehouse Copy Share Image
“Language-lovers know that there is a word for every fear. Are you afraid of wine? Then you have oenophobia. Tremulous about train… — Steven Pinker Copy Share Image
You could begin to notice whenever you find yourself blaming others or justifying yourself. If you spent the rest of your life… — Pema Chodron Copy Share Image
I can't be as open on national television as I can when I'm having dinner with friends. But that doesn't mean the… — Matt Lauer Copy Share Image
![“I have spiritual beliefs that I could literally go out and make an entire comedy routine about, and tour as some sort of spiritual guru, but it kind of goes against that [as] I actually believe the things, so I'm always kind of caught in the middle.” quote by Jim Carrey](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/90d/jim-carrey-1172_belief_i-have-spiritual-beliefs-that-i-could-li_2847008.jpg)
