“Every couple of months or so, some boundary breaking article comes out in a nationally published magazine. The article makes a big… — Mindy Kaling Copy Share Image
I might not be the biggest ,but I'm still big I might not be the fastest ,but I'm still fast I might… — MrCountry Copy Share Image
“Sex," the driver said, "Has no one ever told you about it?" I took the New York Times from my carry-on bag… — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
“When she heard about Mitch, it was Roberta that talked me into making the pizza. “You have to!” she’d nearly shrieked. She… — Kristen Ashley Copy Share Image
“When you’re poor and hungry and frightened of failure, you often don’t have the luxury of high values, lofty goals, and social… — Rodney Romig Copy Share Image
“And for once, Donald Rumsfeld, in the news at the time over the Iraq war made sense to me: "As we know,"… — Benjamin Mee Copy Share Image
“A little boy was tugging on his pant leg. 'Teacher, I have to pee.' Avila woke from his skating dreams and looked… — John Ajvide Lindqvist Copy Share Image
“(Via Malcolm)"...For the moment, I have this incredible gift...It just happened. I bend, whisper, sing, shout—and a radiant light surrounds and then… — Kathleen Maher Copy Share Image
Sometimes dealing with people is like reviewing a restaurant menu. You have your totally tasteless folks. Then you have ones who are… — Eugene Nathaniel Butler Copy Share Image
“Outside of having kids, getting tattooed is one of the worst mistakes a person can make, yet somehow (much like having kids)… — Aviva Yael Copy Share Image
“You’re a goddam funny kid, Clivey,” he said. “I got sixteen grandchildren, and there’s only two of em that I think is… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
When you're doing physical comedy, everybody's involved, not just the actors. Everybody's behind the scenes following them, and we've got Jillian the… — J. Robert Spencer Copy Share Image
“Teagan: How long has it been since you read a book that didn’t havevampires in it? Abby: They write books with no… — Kersten Hamilton Copy Share Image
I think I'm too cynical for L.A. My sense of humor doesn't go down well here, which probably affects my love life.… — Teddy Thompson Copy Share Image
Humour has to have a huge nugget of truth to be funny. You cannot laugh at something unbelievable. Whenever I say something… — Twinkle Khanna Copy Share Image
“Right, if I told you, I'd have to kill you." Emma frowned. "If you kill me, you aren't getting any nookie." She… — Dana Marie Bell Copy Share Image
“Someone very clever—certainly someone much cleverer than whoever had trained that imp—must have made the clock for the Partrician’s waiting room. It… — Terry Pratchett Copy Share Image
“By God, you Assassins are a cheery bunch, eh? All frowns and furrowed brows.” He glared at me. “Captain Kenway. You have… — Oliver Bowden Copy Share Image
One thing I hate in ethnic comedy is giving the audience the opportunity to laugh in a racist way at a thing.… — Ari Shaffir Copy Share Image
“For a brief second, I entertained the idea of ripping off my gloves, rushing down the hall, and jumping on Dustin’s back… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“Herr Kafka, essen Sie keine Eier." (As one and only piece of dialog K recalls from his meeting with Rudolf Steiner -… — Franz Kafka Copy Share Image
You start in bars and then restaurants, then you want to get into comedy clubs where you feature, then you headline, and… — Bill Burr Copy Share Image
“I mean, really. Who sends their kid to boarding school? It's so Hogwarts. Only mine doesn't have cute boy wizards or magic… — Stephanie Perkins Copy Share Image
“Human females, they're kind of crazy during this time aren't they? If you chose to believe the stories written by male writers.… — Anne Biship Copy Share Image
“When it comes to women, I've found it's best to lead with confidence, follow with comedy, and close with red-hot sex. I… — Julie Ann Walker Copy Share Image
Wit is artificial; humor is natural. Wit is accidental; humor is inevitable. Wit is born of conscious effort; humor, of the allotted… — Agnes Repplier Copy Share Image
I seem to have a one-track mind. When I was having babies, I did nothing else. When I do pictures, I go… — Maureen O'Sullivan Copy Share Image
In my experience, it's not just that serious books get a hearing on comedy shows. But serious books get a serious hearing,… — Michael Mandelbaum Copy Share Image
“Allegedly, allegedly I say, the R.G.A. were extremely miffed of portrait painted of their monarch, King Tingaling XX, by Master. Portrait apparently,… — Elias Zapple Copy Share Image
The scotch egg is such a Scottish food. It's as though a great Scottish chef said: I need a tasty snack. Let's… — Bill Bailey Copy Share Image
“I hate Risk. I have for many years now. I hate that you still like Risk. I hate that you guilt me… — Colin Nissan Copy Share Image
When you only hang out with performers, you start to feel like movies and TV and comedy is everything. Especially being in… — Gillian Jacobs Copy Share Image
'Family Ties' was a very successful situation comedy. And, in almost every respect, it functioned on a day to day basis like… — Gary David Goldberg Copy Share Image
Disneyland is such a big thing to Californians, I discovered that when you cross the border you have to raise your right… — Jack Paar Copy Share Image
On a throne at the center of a sense of humor sits a capacity for irony. All wit rests on a cheerful… — George Will Copy Share Image
“You like Nick a lot, don't you, Nora?" Dorothy asked. "He's an old Greek fool, but I'm used to him." "Charles isn't… — Dashiell Hammett Copy Share Image
“So, could there be a cure?' Nora looked at me out of the corner of her eye. I found myself looking at… — Lia Habel Copy Share Image
There are so many funny women in the world, and there has been for so many years, so I'll be happy when… — Kristen Wiig Copy Share Image
“Well, man, you know what they say." No, I don't. I don't know what they say. I don't even know who they… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
Especially when you deal with comedy, you have got to be really honest because it's the honesty and the spontaneity that causes… — Austin Peck Copy Share Image
