First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff. — Matt Groening Copy Share Image
We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun?… — Homer Copy Share Image
A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds...it makes ice. — Homer Copy Share Image
Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that… — Homer Copy Share Image
You know, the one with all the well meaning rules that don't work out in real life, uh, Christianity. — Homer Copy Share Image
When a woman says nothing's wrong, that means everything's wrong. And when a woman says everything's wrong, that means everything's wrong! And… — Homer Copy Share Image
Revenge is good. It's what separates us from the animals and the hippies. — Christopher Titus Copy Share Image
I've always wondered if there was a God. And now I know there is -- and it's me. — Homer Copy Share Image