My neighbor complains every time my girlfriend and I have sex. We're not even that loud. But he used to date my… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
It happens a lot that women have to play the girlfriend role, which isn't as three-dimensional as the male role. — Georgina Campbell Copy Share Image
Just because I don't say Hi doesn't mean I don't want to, because truth is I'm dying to. — Abhishek Tiwari Copy Share Image
Good boyfriend/girlfriend wont demand your full time , they know that you should spend time with your family and friends¦. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My GirlFriend told me that she want me to act a little more like her father. So I fucked her mom. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
None of us has a girlfriend. But being in a band, you meet people everywhere you go. I know mine will turn… — Isaac Hanson Copy Share Image
I say 'cuz' around Bloods, and I say 'blood' around Crips...I'm twisted. Got Mary, got Lucy, got Molly: that's wifey, girlfriend and… — Ab-Soul Copy Share Image
“I was to happy about that to ask him when his girlfriend would get to see him naked.” — Amy Noelle Copy Share Image
My girlfriend said she liked to be teased in the bedroom so, last night in bed I told her, Your new glasses… — Green Monk Copy Share Image
I had to break up with my last girlfriend for lying about being raped by her neighbor. But I've met her neighbor,… — Anthony Jeselnik Copy Share Image
My girlfriend says that I thrash throughout the night, for longer periods than are generally accepted as corresponding to REM sleep, and… — Keith Murray Copy Share Image
I don't think there is just one Louis Vuitton woman. That is why, for the fall/winter 2011 show, I loved the idea… — Marc Jacobs Copy Share Image
“Oh. That. Look, that was a time long time ago. That’s not going to happen this time. I’m clean. I just want… — Maggie Stiefvater Copy Share Image
Even thou money cannot buy happiness, but it is necessary in keeping your girlfriend forever. Relationships are expensive Boy. What do you… — Sabelo Lan Mashabela Copy Share Image
My girlfriend buys stuff from Trader Joe's, and it's just subpar. When you buy a burrito, it crumbles the way a proper… — Jim Jefferies Copy Share Image
Well, I think there's not much of a chance for me finding somebody of my age. Gentlemen of my age are dropping… — Victoria Wood Copy Share Image
I have since talked to some of my girlfriends sexual assault and found out that they had their own experiences that they… — Kirsten Gillibrand Copy Share Image
“I can say this because she’s my girlfriend, even if, at the moment, she’s only my girlfriend in secret - Eliza has… — Tiffanie DeBartolo Copy Share Image
“Well.” I’m quiet for a few seconds, weighing whether I’m about to make a giant mistake. Probably, but I plow ahead anyway.… — Karen M. McManus Copy Share Image
Advice to rock gods: drugwise, stick to Ibuprofen, decaf lattes, and pale Pilsners ... If your stomach is not a flat slab,… — Ian Shoales Copy Share Image
“You told me this wasn't a formal date when you invited me to come. Why should I care if you have a… — Amy Plum Copy Share Image
“You still with your floozy girlfriend?” Ah, there is was. The elephant in the car… He gave her an incredulous look. “Obviously… — Karina Halle Copy Share Image
I was talking to my friend and he said his girlfriend was mad at him. I said, "What happened?" He goes: "Well,… — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
“I bet he's an actual good guy. The kind that I desperately need in my life. The thing of it is, he'll… — M. Leighton Copy Share Image
Can't he be lonely and unbalanced around someone else's girlfriend? — Kiersten White Copy Share Image
