Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, Oh crap, shes up. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when your making a stupid face & your crush looks right at you — Anonymous Copy Share Image
You shouldn't listen in on your sister's conversation with her boyfriend because it gets too mushy. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you shout the wrong answer in the class with confidence !! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Well thank you very much, I didn't expect birthday greetings form outer space. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Given the amount of food I plan to gorge on this year, I'm not confident in the integrity of this chair's construction. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hope my anus and genitals roasting in 95-degree weather all day doesn't turn you off from giving me oral sex tonight. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The ideal man doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs, doesn't swear, doesn't become wild, doesn't survive. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When people see you lying down with your eyes closed and they still ask 'Are you sleeping?' I reply, 'No, I'm training… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Mom, thanks for not answering the phone. I could be locked in some rapist's basementfor all you know. Thanks, nice to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
They say guns don't kill people, people kill people. Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG,… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I like wearing big sweaters. Not cause they're all comfy, but when the sleeves are really big I get to flop them… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Cop pulls man over for suspicion of drunk driving. Cop: Sir have you been drinking? Man: No. Cop: Papers. Man: Scissors, I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share
Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer… — Anonymous Copy Share
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share
The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,… — Anonymous Copy Share
