Sleeping is my drug, my bed is the dealer, and my alarm clock is the police.. — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
One day I want to be walking home in a thunderstorm after a one night stand it's pouring rain, thundering and lightning, and a lightning bolt hits the tip of my penis the voice of Morgan Freeman says SON! You'… — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
Okay seriously.. to all you girls out there, after you give a blowjob to us don't try and kiss us alright? Your breath smells… — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
Sleeping is my drug, my bed is the dealer, and my alarm clock is the police.. — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
You know what they mean by beauty isn't on the inside right? It means once you're inside her it's beautiful! — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
Did you buy your pants on sale? Cause in my room they'd be 100% off. — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
One day I want to be walking home in a thunderstorm after a one night stand it's pouring rain, thundering and lightning, and a… — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
Hey I just met you, and this is crazy but here's my digits so fuck me crazy ! — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
Okay fat girls it's called plenty of fish not plenty of whales, and don't take pictures of your face and boobs we don't want… — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
A slut is like the first piece of bread in a loaf, everyone touches it, but nobody wants it. — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
It's funny how one person can mean the world to you make you feel so good and so bad so fast, I don't know… — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
I swear to god, the next time in nearly asleep and I get a text I'm going to bully and humiliate them with harsh… — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
If your girlfriend was a video game she would be rated E for everyone.. — Mitchell Sakundiak Copy Share Image
