“Let's put it to a vote. Shall the ballots be open or secret?" "We don't need Soviet-style voting," Charushnikov said, offended. "Let's vote the honest way, the European way: secret ballots.” — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“Ippolit Matveevich turned even redder, pulled out a tiny notebook, and wrote in a calligraphic hand: 25/4/1927 — rubles issued to Comrade Bender —… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
Americans don't like to waste time on stupid things, for example, on the torturous process of coming up with names for their towns. And… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“If you should attempt to maintain that film is an art in conversation with a cultured, intelligent American, he'll just plain stop talking to… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“It wouldn't have been surprising if the girl suddenly stamped her foot and began: "Comrades! Allow me to summarize the achievements which . .… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“Investigating Koreiko's case might take a long time," said Ostap. "God only knows how long. And since there is no God, nobody knows. We… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“She was, after all, a mattress owner and understood the subtleties of life.” — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“So what was in this building before historical materialism?' 'Before what?' 'You know, back then, under the old regime?' 'Oh. Under the old regime… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“The word "America" has well-developed grandiose associations for a Soviet person, for whom it refers to a country of skyscrapers, where day and night… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“I am Emir Dynamite!" he shouted, swaying on top of the tall camelback. "If within two days we don't get any decent food, I'll… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
“He was only thirty-eight. His body was clean, well-fed, and benign. He had all his teeth. A fresh Armenian joke stirred in his head… — Ilya Ilf Copy Share Image
