In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It has taken a weary long time to persuade American Presbyterians to give up infant damnation and try to bear it the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Mine was a trained Presbyterian conscience and knew but the one duty - to hunt and harry its slave upon all pretexts… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I cannot call to mind a single instance where I have ever been irreverent, except toward the things which were sacred to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
When one's character begins to fall under suspicion and disfavor, how swift, then, is the work of disintegration and destruction. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The church is always trying to get other people to reform, it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Nothing agrees with me. If I drink coffee, it gives me dyspepsia; if I drink wine, it gives me the gout; if… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The choir always tittered and whispered all through the service. There was once a church choir that was not ill-bred, but I… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If Christ were here now, there is one thing he would not be a Christian. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The two Testaments are interesting, each in its own way. The Old one gives us a picture of these people's Deity as… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Stripping away the irrational, the illogical, and the impossible, I am left with atheism. I can live with that. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings.… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Strange a God who mouths Golden Rules and forgiveness, then invented hell; who mouths morals to other people and has none Himself;… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; ... I should be sorry to have… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A man is accepted into a church for what he believes and he is turned out for what he knows. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Begin with the determination to succeed and the work is half done already. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
