Hockey is the only place where a guy can go nowadays and…

If you've only got one day to live, come see the Toronto Maple Leafs. It'll seem like forever.

— Pat LaFontaine

Hockey belongs to the Cartoon Network, where a person can be pancaked by an ACME anvil, then expanded - accordion-style - back to full…

— Steve Rushin

The only way you can check Gretzky is to hit him when he is standing still singing the national anthem.

— Harry Sinden

We get nose jobs all the time in the NHL, and we don't even have to go to the hospital.

— Brad Park

Hockey is the only job I know where you get paid to have a nap on the day of the game.

— Chico Resch

A puck is a hard rubber disk that hockey players strike when they can't hit one another.

— Jimmy Cannon

Hockey is a fast, body-contact game played by men with clubs in their hands and knives laced to their feet.

— Paul Gallico

How would you like a job where, if you made a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?

— Jacques Plante

Hockey s a funny game. You have to prove yourself every shift, every game. It's not up to anybody else. You have to take…

— Paul Coffey

Ice hockey is a form of disorderly conduct in which the score is kept.

— Doug Larson

Half the game is mental, the other half is being mental.

— Jim McKenny

Street hockey is great for kids. It's energetic, competitive, and skilful. And best of all, it keeps them off the street.

— Gus Kyle

Yeah, I'm cocky and I am arrogant. But that doesn't mean I'm not a nice person.

— Jeremy Roenick

By the age of 18, the average American has witnessed 200,000 acts of violence on television, most of them occurring during Game 1 of…

— Steve Rushin

Hockey captures the essence of Canadian experience in the New World. In a land so inescapably and inhospitably cold, hockey is the chance of…

— Stephen Leacock