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Looking after children can be a subtle way of giving up…

“Looking after children can be a subtle way of giving up... They become the whole ones, the well ones, the postponement of happiness, the ones who won't drink too much, give up, get divorced, become mentally ill. The part of oneself that's fighting against decay and depression is transferred to…” quote by Edward St Aubyn
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“Looking after children can be a subtle way of giving up... They become the whole ones, the well ones, the postponement of happiness, the ones who won't drink too much, give up, get divorced, become mentally ill. The part of oneself that's fighting against decay and depression is transferred to guarding them from decay and depression. In the meantime one decays and gets depressed.”

Edward St Aubyn

About This Quote

This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.

Caring for children can become a proxy for avoiding one's own decline, leading to personal decay.

In simple terms: Protecting kids may mask self‑neglect and depression.

Key Takeaway

Recognize and address your own needs.

Themes

parenthood self‑sacrifice mental health

Mood

somber thoughtful

Type

cautionary philosophical

When to use this quote

  • family life
  • therapy sessions
  • support groups
  • self‑care routines

Key Concepts

psychodynamic caregiver burnout

Questions to Reflect On

  • How do you balance caring for others with self‑care?
  • What signs indicate you’re neglecting your own wellbeing?
A Different Perspective

Focusing solely on others can exacerbate personal suffering.

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