First, let’s talk a little human psychology. In basic…
““First, let’s talk a little human psychology. In basic terms, people’s emotions have two levels: the “presenting” behavior is the part above the surface you can see and hear; beneath, the “underlying” feeling is what motivates the behavior. Imagine a grandfather who’s grumbly at a family holiday dinner: the presenting behavior is that he’s cranky, but the underlying emotion is a sad sense of loneliness from his family never seeing him. What good negotiators do when labeling is address those underlying emotions. Labeling negatives diffuses them (or defuses them, in extreme cases); labeling positives reinforces them.””
About This Quote
This interpretation was drafted with AI assistance. It is one reading of the quote, not the author's own explanation.
Negotiators should identify and name the hidden feelings driving observable actions to reduce tension and build rapport.
In simple terms: Name hidden emotions to calm situations.
Label feelings to defuse conflict.
Themes
Mood
Type
When to use this quote
- business negotiations
- personal relationships
- team meetings
- customer service
Key Concepts
Questions to Reflect On
- How can you ensure your label matches the true feeling?
- What if the other person resists being labeled?
Labels may oversimplify complex emotions, risking misinterpretation.