Noel Coward

Everybody worships me, it's nauseating.

— Noel Coward

Bed is the perfect climate.

— Noel Coward

The sun never sets on Government House.

— Noel Coward

Mad dogs and Englishmen go out in the mid-day sun.

— Noel Coward

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.

— Noel Coward

“Work is more fun than fun.”

— Noel Coward

She had much in common with Hitler, only no mustache.

— Noel Coward

Certain women should be struck regularly, like gongs.

— Noel Coward

We have no reliable guarantee that the afterlife will be any less exasperating than this one, have we?

— Noel Coward

How about slipping out of those wet things and into a dry Martini?

— Noel Coward

I also avoid green vegetables. They're grossly overrated.

— Noel Coward

Never mind, dear, we're all made the same, though some more than others.

— Noel Coward

Good heavens, television is something you appear on; you don't watch.

— Noel Coward

There isn't a particle of you that I don't know, remember, and want.

— Noel Coward

It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.

— Noel Coward

“It's a pity you didn't have a little more brandy. It might have made you more agreeable!”

— Noël Coward

At twelve noon, The natives swoon And no further work is doneBut mad dogs and Englishmen, Go out in the midday sun.

— Noel Coward

I refuse to endure months of expensive humiliation only to be told that at the age of four I was in love…

— Noel Coward

It's such a surprise for the Eastern eyes to see, That though the English are effete They're quite impervious to heat.

— Noel Coward

Acting is not a state of being ... but a state of appearing to be. You can't be eight times a week…

— Noel Coward

It's no good pacing up and down. It won't make the plane arrive any faster. Just sit down and accept that we're…

— Noel Coward

“Entering an white tie and tails party wearing an ordinary suit, he announced,"Please, I don't want anyone to apologize for over dressing.”

— Noel Coward

To know you are among people whom you love, and who love you – that has made all the successes wonderful, much…

— Noel Coward

The Stately Homes of England, How beautiful they stand, To prove the Upper Classes, Have still the Upper Hand.

— Noel Coward

If by any chance a playwright wishes to express a political opinion or a moral opinion or a philosophy, he must be…

— Noel Coward

An infant prodigy of nine is shoved upon the stage in white. She starts off in a dismal whine about a dark…

— Noel Coward

Any part of the piggy Is quite all right with me Ham from Westphalia, ham from Parma Ham as lean as the…

— Noel Coward

Running is the classical road to self-consciousn ess, self-awareness and self-reliance. Independence is the outstanding characteristic of a runner. He learns the…

— Noel Coward

My philosophy is as simple as ever - smoking, drinking, moderate sexual intercourse on a diminishing scale, reading and writing (not arithmetic).…

— Noel Coward

“To hell with God damned "L'Amour." It always causes far more trouble than it is worth. Don't run after it. Don't court…

— Noël Coward

Fifty-four years of love and tenderness and crossness and devotion and unswerving loyalty. Without her I could have achieved a quarter of…

— Noel Coward

Let's drink to the spirit of gallantry and courage that made a strange Heaven out of unbelievable Hell, and let's drink to…

— Noel Coward

Of course, the age-old tradition that a star must appear even if he or she is practically dying is an excellent one,…

— Noel Coward

It is my considered opinion that the human race (soi disant) is cruel, idiotic, sentimental, predatory, ungrateful, ugly, conceited and egocentric to…

— Noel Coward

“It is difficult for me to wag my finger at you from so very far away, particularly as my heart aches for…

— Noël Coward

“Act I, Scene 1 GARRY: …My worst defect is that I am apt to worry too much about what people think of…

— Noël Coward

“In tropical climes, there are certain times of day,When the citiens retire to tear their clothes off and perspire.--It s one of…

— Noël Coward

It's never too early for a cocktail.

— Noel Coward

My life really has been one long extravaganza.

— Noel Coward

Learn the lines and don't bump into the furniture.

— Noel Coward