If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed. — Mark Twain Books Copy Share Image
I thoroughly believe that any man who's got anything worthwhile to say will be heard if he only says it often enough. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It was the schoolboy who said, ""Faith is believing what you know ain't so."" — Mark Twain Anti religious Copy Share Image
Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community, and I'll tell you what his opinions are. — Mark Twain Community Copy Share Image
I persuaded him to throw the dirk away; and it was as easy as persuading a child to give up some bright… — Mark Twain Children Copy Share Image
Not all the Greek runners in the original Olympics were totally naked. Some wore shoes. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There ought to be a room in every house to swear in. It's dangerous to have to repress an emotion like that. — Mark Twain Cursing Copy Share Image
Adam did not want the apple for the apple's sake; he wanted it because it was forbidden. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The world has corrected the Bible. The church never corrects it; and also never fails to drop in at the tail of… — Mark Twain Bible Copy Share Image
It is easy to make plans in this world; even a cat can do it; and when one is out in those… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Familiarity breeds contempt. How accurate that is. The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It has always been a peculiarity of the human race that it keeps two sets of morals in stock-the private and the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“He had discovered a great law of human action, without knowing it, namely, that, in order to make a man or a… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
“Artemus Ward used that trick a good deal; then when the belated audience presently caught the joke he would look up with… — Mark Twain Comedy Copy Share Image
Agassiz does recommend authors to eat fish, because the phosphorus in it makes brains. But I cannot help you to a decision… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
There is no such thing as material covetousness. All covetousness is spiritual. ...Any so-called material thing that you want is merely a… — Mark Twain Covetousness Copy Share Image
In Austria an editor who can write well is valuable, but he is not likely to remain so unless he can handle… — Mark Twain Austria Copy Share Image
Never learn to do anything: if you don't learn, you'll always find someone else to do it for you. — Mark Twain Education Copy Share Image
“Sage went supperless to bed, and tossed and writhed all night upon a shuck mattress that was full of attentive and interested… — Mark Twain Humorous Copy Share Image
A healthy and wholesome cheerfulness is not necessarily impossible to any occupation. — Mark Twain Cheerfulness Copy Share Image
When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it's a sure sign you're getting old. — Mark Twain Friendship Copy Share Image
I believe I have had the most trouble with a portrait which I painted in installments - the head on one canvas… — Mark Twain Artist Copy Share Image
Happiness ain't a thing in itself - it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man but deteriorate the cat. — Mark Twain Cat Copy Share Image
“Ljudska vrsta ima samo jedno zaista delotvorno oružje, a to je osmeh. Kada osmeh krene u napad ništa mu ne može odoleti.… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Right is right, and wrong is wrong, and a body ain’t got no business doing wrong when he ain’t ignorant and knows… — Mark Twain Body Copy Share Image
When your watch gets out of order you have choice of two things to do: throw it in the fire or take… — Mark Twain Choices Copy Share Image
when the human race is not grotesque it is because it is asleep and losing its opportunity. — Mark Twain Asleep Copy Share Image
Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
She kept up her compliments, and I kept up my determination to deserve them or die. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I do love compliments, yet I'm often embarrassed to say what I think to the person when I get a compliment. I… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
No one can tell me what is a good cigar--for me. I am the only judge... There are no standards--no real standards.… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
No throne exists that has a right to exist, and no symbol of it, flying from any flagstaff, is righteously entitled to… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.… — Mark Twain Death Copy Share Image
Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary… — Mark Twain Ancient Copy Share Image
[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then,… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Adam was but human—this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple's sake, he wanted it only because… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
We Americans are the most lavish and showiest and most luxury loving people on the earth; and at our masthead we fly… — Mark Twain Earth Copy Share Image
I conceive that the right way to write a story for boys is to write so that it will not only interest… — Mark Twain Audience Copy Share Image
After a few months' acquaintance with European 'coffee' one's mind weakens, and his faith with it, and he begins to wonder if… — Mark Twain Acquaintance Copy Share Image
![“[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.” quote by Mark Twain](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/b42/mark-twain-22_cents_i-shall-never-use-profanity-except-in-di_2142983.png)
