Limmy

The day I say I'm famous is the day I sound like a fanny.

— Limmy

Why do I want to annoy people? Because annoying people is funny.

— Limmy

I'm always checking other people's opinions.

— Limmy

If the Internet went down or there was no telly I would be 'oh no, oh no.'

— Limmy

In my own mind, I can joke about anything.

— Limmy

There have been occasions when some people have taken me very seriously.

— Limmy

It's fine if folk don't like my sense of humour. But if somebody misunderstands, then that hurts a bit.

— Limmy

I don't drink anymore, I don't go up the town and I'm not interested in events and parties.

— Limmy

I've never been an embarrassed, 'never talk about their feelings' sort of person.

— Limmy

Going to the doctors - for me that was quite brave, taking that first step. That was a bit scary, saying that…

— Limmy

Trolling can be a great way to engage with the world, a way to regain self-esteem and happiness, or, dare I say…

— Limmy

I mean, maybe I'm alternative in that my stuff's not mainstream, doesn't want to be mainstream, could never be mainstream.

— Limmy

I'm alright with being disliked rather than trying to be perfect, because you get to relax then.

— Limmy

I like wee arguments, I've never been into jokes. I'm more into strange things and madness and things escalating and things not…

— Limmy

There are so many different ways of making people laugh and sometimes you sit down to watch something that everyone says is…

— Limmy

I love saying terrible things. Things that I think are terrible and I've gotten in to trouble in the past - just…

— Limmy

With my upbringing and where I grew up, people slagged people. If you slagged them, they'd slag you back... I know it…

— Limmy

Daft Wee Stories' is, as the title says, daft wee stories. I just sort of rattled them out, tried to make them…

— Limmy

I felt I was a bit switched off for years, not really caring about things. I don't know if that's depression or…

— Limmy

I think on my passport form I described myself as 'entertainer,' filling it in, in a Post Office or something. I felt…

— Limmy

I've said things on Twitter that I've said deliberately because I think they're out of order, I think that's the sense of…

— Limmy

Sometimes there were certain things in 'Limmy's Show' where I'd be having to come up with six episodes and as a result…

— Limmy

With the Internet I just love how anything goes, especially in the light of this whole Sachsgate.

— Limmy

I write in quite a simple way because that's just the way I write. The vocab I use is quite wee. That's…

— Limmy

You can get too involved with all the wee things in life, but the most important thing is you're alive and well.

— Limmy

Once you get it in your head you're finished with something, to go back, it hurts.

— Limmy

I've always had something a wee bit up with me, but I think it's some kind of learning difficulty. It's always been…

— Limmy

No, I don't think I'll ever get any stalkers, as I'm the stalker type myself.

— Limmy

I'm genuine! I've not got some dark, shadowy corporation behind me pulling the strings.

— Limmy

I think everybody in the world should agree to no care about anything. But we'll all have to do it at the…

— Limmy

I don't need a lot: I've got a telly, a computer - what else can you get me?

— Limmy

I'd never dance at school discos, I couldn't believe people could show themselves like that.

— Limmy

It's almost like schizophrenia the way I get ideas about things that are not really happening and just end up focusing on…

— Limmy

I get a lot of ideas sitting in the living room staring at the walls or lying in bed thinking about things.

— Limmy

People say 'Limmy's Show' is kind of hit or miss, but I'd rather that than having something generally likable.

— Limmy

There's nothing quite like sitting watching the telly on a Saturday night. It has such a nice, homely feel.

— Limmy

Actually, I just want to entertain people. Put that in my obituary, a final picture, all dark in the background.

— Limmy

I've got a sick sense of humour, a dark sense of humour. I do care about things and care about people but…

— Limmy

Me, you could stick me in solitary confinement for 100 years and I'd be fine.

— Limmy

If you run about trying to make people like you all the time you'd never get anything done.

— Limmy