“He buckled his seat belt, which he always did because he never knew when he would need to ramp something. He made… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“...and - holy shit was this song bad. It was like the singer was stabbing my ear with a dagger made of… — David Wong Analogies Copy Share Image
Antidepressants. The thought of this girl actually being depressed made me want to grab the whole planet and throw it into the… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“Our true fear of the zombie was never that its bite would turn us into one of them. Our fear is that… — David Wong Fear Copy Share Image
“I said, “This could not be any stupider.” John said, “Dave, you remember the words to ‘Camel Holocaust’?” “Ah, once again, you… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“John cursed himself. Or rather, he cursed the past version of himself for so thoughtlessly screwing over the current version of himself.” — David Wong Copy Share Image
“Some would have doubted their sanity at this point, but by now the part of my mind that issued doubts about my… — David Wong Copy Share Image
And watch out for Molly. See if she does anything unusual. There’s something I don’t trust about the way she exploded and… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“I stopped at a red light, feeling foolish as always for stopping at an intersection at an hour when the streets are… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“After a moment I realized it was simply Fred Durst and the group Limp Bizkit—Shitload’s favorite band. They’re the ones who invented… — David Wong Favorite band Copy Share Image
“John glanced around, half expecting to see a disheveled Dave pulling himself up from some spot on the floor. He'd be squinting,… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“I wake up in a mood that I know will lead me to assault the very first person who asks me if… — David Wong First person Copy Share Image
“I struggled for something to cling to, the way soldiers in foxholes picture their families, or a flag. My car, I thought… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“So, they dig up my address and stick it in the mail. “David Wong will know what to do with it!” No,… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“It is believed that during the coronation of a new Pharaoh, he would be required to masturbate in front of the crowd,… — David Wong Pharaoh Copy Share Image
Let's say you have an ax. Just a cheap one, from Home Depot. On one bitter winter day, you use said ax… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“John and I have made this stuff our hobby, in the way that an especially attractive prisoner makes a hobby out of… — David Wong Humorous Copy Share Image
“It was a sunrise, a kid’s sight of snowfall on a school morning. Hope. That all this can turn out okay, that… — David Wong Christmas tree Copy Share Image
Different moralities must share some general features if they are to perform their functions of coordinating beings having particular kinds of motivations.… — David Wong Character Copy Share Image
“I stared at the price tags and thought, Why don’t you fucking kill yourself? I have that thought a lot, actually. Hey,… — David Wong Copy Share Image
Individuals understood in relational terms cannot be conceived as fully separate from their communities. Others in one's community may already be a… — David Wong Community Copy Share Image
I had seen that look before, on the faces of tourists visiting the Texas Book Depository in Dallas where Lee Harvey Oswald… — David Wong Book Copy Share Image
The man walked past me and stopped, observing the blood running down my neck. "Your injury. Let us tend to it." He… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“All right, but you know Star Trek, and ‘Beam me up, Scotty’? How they can teleport people around?” “Yeah. The transporters.” “Do… — David Wong Computers Copy Share Image
Which would prove I'm a monster, Arnie? Sacrificing the people I love for the fight? Or walking away from the fight to… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“He had braces, sported a black Limp Bizkit Tshirt. Limp Bizkit is a band that was popular at the time. If you’re… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“There was a sound like a garbage bag of pudding dropped off a tall building onto a sidewalk. Robert had erupted, chunks… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“I closed my eyes and let out a breath that smelled like I’d eaten an entire wet dog and washed it down… — David Wong Copy Share Image
... life is a flickering candle we all carry around. A gust of wind, a meaningless accident, a microsecond of carelessness, and… — David Wong Accidents Copy Share Image
“I just realized he was phrasing all of his questions as statements. Wasn’t there a character in Alice in Wonderland who did… — David Wong Copy Share Image
In a morally healthy family the good of each member of a family includes and overlaps with the good of other members.… — David Wong Family Copy Share Image
“Well," I said. "Nothing to do right now but wander the fuck into that abandoned building, totally unarmed.” — David Wong Copy Share Image
“If they didn’t want the patients at the Undisclosed Ffirth Asylum command center slash patient processing facility to feel like prisoners, they… — David Wong Asylum Copy Share Image
“And I’m not crazy. I mean, I know anybody can say that. But a crazy person can’t fake sane, right?” — David Wong Copy Share Image
No, I don't, like, play an instrument or anything.I'm just...well, you saw me at the beginning there. I was the guy that… — David Wong Copy Share Image
“A ghost sighting is usually nothing more than your brain trying to put a familiar face on something that does not have… — David Wong Ghost Copy Share Image
“Problem isn’t that there’s not enough heroes in the world, problem is too many dumb people assume they are one.” — David Wong Dumb people Copy Share Image
But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them. — David Wong Dehumanize Copy Share Image
“A wash of alien sensations crashed over him, like being naked at the bottom of a frantic orgy involving everyone in that… — David Wong Star wars Copy Share Image
“You don't realize how terrifying the world can be for someone like that, someone who would rather stay in a familiar hole… — David Wong Terrifying Copy Share Image
