There is not a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If you want to change the future, you must change what you're doing in the present. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
An ecstasy is a thing that will not go into words; it feels like music. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I have spent most of my life worrying about things that have never happened. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Those that respect the law and love sausage should watch neither being made. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
One of life's most over-valued pleasures is sexual intercourse; of one of life's least appreciated pleasures in defecation. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father; He is always longing for the love of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
One frequently only finds out how really beautiful a women is, until after considerable acquaintance with her. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
After all these years I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; it is better to live outside the… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Dance like no one's watching.Love like you've never been hurt.Sing like no one's listening.Live like heaven is on Earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
In early times some sufferer had to sit up with a toothache, and he put in the time inventing the German language. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening,love like you've ever been hurt,dance like nobody's watching.And live like it's heaven on earth — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The humorous writer professes to awaken and direct your love, your pity, your kindness--your scorn for untruth, pretension, imposture…He takes upon himself… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I have always been rather better treated in San Francisco than I actually deserved. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Damn these human beings; if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It's not the parts of the Bible I don't know that worries me...it's the parts that I do. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
If the metrics you are looking at aren't useful in optimizing your strategy - stop looking at them. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
No public interest is anything other or nobler than a massed accumulation of private interests. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Grown people everywhere are always likely to cling to the religion they were brought up in. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
To one in sympathy with nature, each season, in its turn, seems the loveliest. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Priapism is what happens when someone gets strangulated to the point of hypoxia. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The frankest and freest and privatest product of the human mind and heart is a love letter... — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Between us, we cover all knowledge; he knows all that can be known and I know the rest. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share
If we could imagine such a man, that is a man who could invent the fly and send him out on his mission and… — Mark Twain Copy Share
You perceive, now, that these things are all impossible except in a dream. You perceive that they are pure and puerile insanities, the silly… — Mark Twain Copy Share
Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. — Mark Twain Copy Share
